Ooohhh! I’m tellin’!

6 06 2004

I got in trouble today. Yes, it’s true. I was reprimanded by a big fat meany cat. The great and powerful got behind his little curtain and pulled his levers and punched his buttons and spoke into his distort-o-matic microphone to make his squeaky, weasel-y voice sound mondo-scary-o. He made the giant head appear with the veins bulging in its oversized brow, and the flames leapt high, and the smoke billowed, and the scarecrow quaked, and the lion ran away. He bellowed like a hippopotamus with heartburn, and his words shook the foundations of the little cardboard shack he lives in down behind a dumpster at WalMart.

His message was clear. That’s all I’m saying.

I ate a salad for lunch. Red-leaf lettuce, red bell pepper, red onion, and strawberries (they were red, too), some baby spinach, basil pesto dressing, and a nice dollop of Joe Bucks’ cranberry-almond chicken salad on top (for protein). It was almost as good as a sea bass to my eyes. For dessert I ate Starbucks Low Fat Latte Ice Cream. My tummy is purring in gastronomic contentedness.

He stood on the steps above her, feet planted, arms crossed, the red feathers on his black, captain’s hat dancing in the breeze. She looked up at him and smiled.

“Oh,” she said. “The cleverness of you!”

I have only one question. Are you happy now, Jesse?


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24 responses

6 06 2004
allenb

Uh Huh … NOW who’s off her meds?

6 06 2004
allenb

Uh Huh … NOW who’s off her meds?

6 06 2004
lbsteffy

It’s a mystery

If feel like I’ve been left in a cloud of dust as your car of life drives away. What has been going on down in TX these last couple weeks?!

6 06 2004
lbsteffy

It’s a mystery

If feel like I’ve been left in a cloud of dust as your car of life drives away. What has been going on down in TX these last couple weeks?!

6 06 2004
jeannedamoff

I was on top of the world. Everything was going just as planned. But then I couldn’t unplug the toaster, because George was heating a frozen waffle.

Some things are clearly not my fault.

6 06 2004
jeannedamoff

I was on top of the world. Everything was going just as planned. But then I couldn’t unplug the toaster, because George was heating a frozen waffle.

Some things are clearly not my fault.

6 06 2004
jeannedamoff

Re: It’s a mystery

What’s been going on in Texas?

Thunderstorms. Almost every night. I think of Grace, because she loves them, and they’ll probably wear themselves out and leave town before she comes home.

Also, my car of life decided it didn’t want to be a Toyota Echo any more. It wants to be a Mini Cooper. I think it’s having a mid-life crisis.

You do realize the “sea bass” comment belongs to you and only you.

♥ EZ

6 06 2004
jeannedamoff

Re: It’s a mystery

What’s been going on in Texas?

Thunderstorms. Almost every night. I think of Grace, because she loves them, and they’ll probably wear themselves out and leave town before she comes home.

Also, my car of life decided it didn’t want to be a Toyota Echo any more. It wants to be a Mini Cooper. I think it’s having a mid-life crisis.

You do realize the “sea bass” comment belongs to you and only you.

♥ EZ

6 06 2004
lbsteffy

Mini Coopers rock like the British

How does that comment only belong to me?! It was first Jacob’s, Grace’s and yours… not mine. But hey, I tend to bring it up the most, so if it shall be me, than it shall be mine. I love it!

6 06 2004
lbsteffy

Mini Coopers rock like the British

How does that comment only belong to me?! It was first Jacob’s, Grace’s and yours… not mine. But hey, I tend to bring it up the most, so if it shall be me, than it shall be mine. I love it!

6 06 2004
jeannedamoff

The proper ownership of said “sea bass,” article C, section IIV, paragraph 7

It belongs to you in this journal entry because I wrote it just for you. And I wrapped it in a red bow (so it would look good with my salad).

6 06 2004
jeannedamoff

The proper ownership of said “sea bass,” article C, section IIV, paragraph 7

It belongs to you in this journal entry because I wrote it just for you. And I wrapped it in a red bow (so it would look good with my salad).

7 06 2004
ragamuffen

When we finally get to meet…we should have a Peter Pan party.

xoxo

7 06 2004
ragamuffen

When we finally get to meet…we should have a Peter Pan party.

xoxo

7 06 2004
jeannedamoff

Well, split my infinitives!

Absolutely! Keep that window open, because I may just show up when you least expect me. And stock up on your happy thoughts. I’ll bring the extra pixie dust.

I hope Neverland is ready for this. ;o)

♥ EZ

7 06 2004
jeannedamoff

Well, split my infinitives!

Absolutely! Keep that window open, because I may just show up when you least expect me. And stock up on your happy thoughts. I’ll bring the extra pixie dust.

I hope Neverland is ready for this. ;o)

♥ EZ

7 06 2004
ljadministrator

I feel so special.

Wow, nearly a whole journal entry dedicated to me. That’s a high honor I will never forget. And yes, I am happy that you are finally posting again. Even though it took all the veins popping out of my neck and… stuff…

And since I just watched Peter Pan last night it just made your entry all the more clever-ly-ness-like-ness.

Jesse

7 06 2004
ljadministrator

I feel so special.

Wow, nearly a whole journal entry dedicated to me. That’s a high honor I will never forget. And yes, I am happy that you are finally posting again. Even though it took all the veins popping out of my neck and… stuff…

And since I just watched Peter Pan last night it just made your entry all the more clever-ly-ness-like-ness.

Jesse

7 06 2004
jeannedamoff

Re: I feel so special.

It’s so special that you feel so special and I’m happy that you’re happy and . . . stuff . . .

Clever-ly-ness-like-ness is my middle name. (I always hated filling in the little dots for it on standardized tests.)

EEEEZZZZZ

7 06 2004
jeannedamoff

Re: I feel so special.

It’s so special that you feel so special and I’m happy that you’re happy and . . . stuff . . .

Clever-ly-ness-like-ness is my middle name. (I always hated filling in the little dots for it on standardized tests.)

EEEEZZZZZ

7 06 2004
ljadministrator

Re: I feel so special.

Yay. I like that. Maybe one day I will be good enough to be your sidekick.

Jesse

7 06 2004
ljadministrator

Re: I feel so special.

Yay. I like that. Maybe one day I will be good enough to be your sidekick.

Jesse

7 06 2004
ljadministrator

Re: I feel so special.

~ A “Big Fat Meany Cat” sidekick!

Jesse

7 06 2004
ljadministrator

Re: I feel so special.

~ A “Big Fat Meany Cat” sidekick!

Jesse

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