“I Feel Pretty” reprise

31 05 2005

So, this morning I’m sitting at the breakfast table, wearing my PJs (baggy, pink-and-grey plaid pants and grey tank top), sporting an interesting bed-head hair event, sipping my latte, and reading the paper. Of course, in order to be able to actually see the paper, I’m wearing my geek-version reading glasses.

George’s voice interrupts my enjoyment of a fascinating article about one of our city commissioners. “Look at you over there, all sexy in your glasses.”

I glance at him over the tortoise-shell frames of said glasses, but I say nothing.

He continues. “All you need is a pocket protector, and you’ll be perfect.”

I smirk. “I don’t even have a pocket.”

“Oh, that’s okay. You could just attach it with Velcro.”

There you have it, folks. Desperate fashion solutions for serious geekdom.

You know, I could have kept this ingenious idea a secret, but I’m offering this one for free to any entrepreneur/inventor-type in the crowd. Here’s your chance to get rich by being the first to market Velcro pocket protectors. Do it for all those die-hard Dilberts who occasionally find themselves up a creek without a pocket.

Oh, and also for the women they love.


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51 responses

31 05 2005
jetpacknomad

I’ll mention it to my dad. I think he’d make a great entrepreneur.

Maybe he’ll even give you a discount.

31 05 2005
jetpacknomad

I’ll mention it to my dad. I think he’d make a great entrepreneur.

Maybe he’ll even give you a discount.

31 05 2005
jetpacknomad

I’ll mention it to my dad. I think he’d make a great entrepreneur.

Maybe he’ll even give you a discount.

31 05 2005
allenb

(furiously scribbling down idear, with hardly a thanks in passing)

31 05 2005
allenb

(furiously scribbling down idear, with hardly a thanks in passing)

31 05 2005
allenb

(furiously scribbling down idear, with hardly a thanks in passing)

31 05 2005
jetpacknomad

I saw it first!

31 05 2005
jetpacknomad

I saw it first!

31 05 2005
jetpacknomad

I saw it first!

31 05 2005
gaia43

You and George give me an idea of waht Andy and I will be like in a few years.

31 05 2005
gaia43

You and George give me an idea of waht Andy and I will be like in a few years.

31 05 2005
gaia43

You and George give me an idea of waht Andy and I will be like in a few years.

31 05 2005
allenb

I’ll tell you what … I’ll race you to the patent office. (rushes out the door and hops in my barnstormer plane. As I pass by the window, I laugh heartily)

HA HA HA HAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!

31 05 2005
allenb

I’ll tell you what … I’ll race you to the patent office. (rushes out the door and hops in my barnstormer plane. As I pass by the window, I laugh heartily)

HA HA HA HAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!

31 05 2005
allenb

I’ll tell you what … I’ll race you to the patent office. (rushes out the door and hops in my barnstormer plane. As I pass by the window, I laugh heartily)

HA HA HA HAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!

31 05 2005
jeannedamoff

“Waiter, could you bring the reality check?”

Wow, guys. Your enthusiasm is heartwarming. But, uh, we’re talking about Velcro pocket protectors here. You know? Pocket protectors to be worn by people who don’t have pockets? Which means they’re protecting . . .

Yeah.

Thanks for making me laugh, though. πŸ™‚

31 05 2005
jeannedamoff

“Waiter, could you bring the reality check?”

Wow, guys. Your enthusiasm is heartwarming. But, uh, we’re talking about Velcro pocket protectors here. You know? Pocket protectors to be worn by people who don’t have pockets? Which means they’re protecting . . .

Yeah.

Thanks for making me laugh, though. πŸ™‚

31 05 2005
jeannedamoff

“Waiter, could you bring the reality check?”

Wow, guys. Your enthusiasm is heartwarming. But, uh, we’re talking about Velcro pocket protectors here. You know? Pocket protectors to be worn by people who don’t have pockets? Which means they’re protecting . . .

Yeah.

Thanks for making me laugh, though. πŸ™‚

31 05 2005
jeannedamoff

Bless your heart! πŸ˜‰

31 05 2005
jeannedamoff

Bless your heart! πŸ˜‰

31 05 2005
jeannedamoff

Bless your heart! πŸ˜‰

31 05 2005
allenb

Re: “Waiter, could you bring the reality check?”

Wait … I know this one. a Chest protector?

31 05 2005
allenb

Re: “Waiter, could you bring the reality check?”

Wait … I know this one. a Chest protector?

31 05 2005
allenb

Re: “Waiter, could you bring the reality check?”

Wait … I know this one. a Chest protector?

31 05 2005
lbsteffy

speaking of inventions…

At the Folk Life Festival yesterday, I met a couple guys who were trying to patent “carpet sandals”. They cut some cushy carpet up in the shape of their sandals and then wore them. Beautiful, I tell ya…

31 05 2005
lbsteffy

speaking of inventions…

At the Folk Life Festival yesterday, I met a couple guys who were trying to patent “carpet sandals”. They cut some cushy carpet up in the shape of their sandals and then wore them. Beautiful, I tell ya…

31 05 2005
lbsteffy

speaking of inventions…

At the Folk Life Festival yesterday, I met a couple guys who were trying to patent “carpet sandals”. They cut some cushy carpet up in the shape of their sandals and then wore them. Beautiful, I tell ya…

1 06 2005
Anonymous

cute!

I love that Geo sees your beauty behind the plaid and glasses. What a good guy!

relevantnerd

1 06 2005
Anonymous

cute!

I love that Geo sees your beauty behind the plaid and glasses. What a good guy!

relevantnerd

1 06 2005
Anonymous

cute!

I love that Geo sees your beauty behind the plaid and glasses. What a good guy!

relevantnerd

1 06 2005
jadeddissonance

Haha. I sincerely hope that I’m as cool as your husband someday.

1 06 2005
jadeddissonance

Haha. I sincerely hope that I’m as cool as your husband someday.

1 06 2005
jadeddissonance

Haha. I sincerely hope that I’m as cool as your husband someday.

1 06 2005
jeannedamoff

There is hope for you yet, young padawan. But you must learn to clear your mind and listen to the worms.

And may the dorks be with you.

1 06 2005
jeannedamoff

There is hope for you yet, young padawan. But you must learn to clear your mind and listen to the worms.

And may the dorks be with you.

1 06 2005
jeannedamoff

There is hope for you yet, young padawan. But you must learn to clear your mind and listen to the worms.

And may the dorks be with you.

1 06 2005
jeannedamoff

Re: cute!

Yes, I suppose it’s a good thing. Except George and I have rather diverse views on what constitutes beauty. Which leaves me in a bit of a quandary. Do I dork out for him or go for a look I like?

I’ll let you guess which of these options I most often choose. πŸ˜‰

1 06 2005
jeannedamoff

Re: cute!

Yes, I suppose it’s a good thing. Except George and I have rather diverse views on what constitutes beauty. Which leaves me in a bit of a quandary. Do I dork out for him or go for a look I like?

I’ll let you guess which of these options I most often choose. πŸ˜‰

1 06 2005
jeannedamoff

Re: cute!

Yes, I suppose it’s a good thing. Except George and I have rather diverse views on what constitutes beauty. Which leaves me in a bit of a quandary. Do I dork out for him or go for a look I like?

I’ll let you guess which of these options I most often choose. πŸ˜‰

1 06 2005
jeannedamoff

Re: speaking of inventions…

I want some of those! Were they selling them?

1 06 2005
jeannedamoff

Re: speaking of inventions…

I want some of those! Were they selling them?

1 06 2005
jeannedamoff

Re: speaking of inventions…

I want some of those! Were they selling them?

7 06 2005
Anonymous

George and my hubby, both…

Jeanne–What a hoot! These are the conversations we have, too. And yeah, this IS the stuff of life. It doesn’t get any better–or thankfully, any worse–than this!! Thanks for the giggles.

7 06 2005
Anonymous

George and my hubby, both…

Jeanne–What a hoot! These are the conversations we have, too. And yeah, this IS the stuff of life. It doesn’t get any better–or thankfully, any worse–than this!! Thanks for the giggles.

7 06 2005
Anonymous

George and my hubby, both…

Jeanne–What a hoot! These are the conversations we have, too. And yeah, this IS the stuff of life. It doesn’t get any better–or thankfully, any worse–than this!! Thanks for the giggles.

7 06 2005
Anonymous

Re: George and my hubby, both…

And when I call myself “anonymous,” I mean, of course, Katy McKenna Raymond at http://www.fallible.com...

7 06 2005
Anonymous

Re: George and my hubby, both…

And when I call myself “anonymous,” I mean, of course, Katy McKenna Raymond at http://www.fallible.com...

7 06 2005
Anonymous

Re: George and my hubby, both…

And when I call myself “anonymous,” I mean, of course, Katy McKenna Raymond at http://www.fallible.com...

7 06 2005
jeannedamoff

Re: George and my hubby, both…

Of course that’s who you mean. Who else? πŸ˜‰

Thanks, Katy. I’ve gathered from reading your blog that Doug’s and your relationship is as, um, “fascinating” as ours. Fun, isn’t it?

7 06 2005
jeannedamoff

Re: George and my hubby, both…

Of course that’s who you mean. Who else? πŸ˜‰

Thanks, Katy. I’ve gathered from reading your blog that Doug’s and your relationship is as, um, “fascinating” as ours. Fun, isn’t it?

7 06 2005
jeannedamoff

Re: George and my hubby, both…

Of course that’s who you mean. Who else? πŸ˜‰

Thanks, Katy. I’ve gathered from reading your blog that Doug’s and your relationship is as, um, “fascinating” as ours. Fun, isn’t it?

Your comments are a gift. Please know I read each one with gratitude.

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