Two weeks before the wedding . . .

“Can you play Trumpet Voluntary?”

“Um, I don’t play trumpet. I play piano.”

“My fiancee likes Trumpet Voluntary. She was wondering if you could maybe play it on the piano while she’s coming down the aisle..”

“Well. I guess if I knew how it sounded, I could try to come as close as a piano can get to trumpets. But I don’t know the song. Do you have the music?”

“No. But it sounds kind of like the theme from Star Wars.”

“Ah ha. I see. Tell ya what. Why don’t I just bring a kazoo, and I can play the Star Wars theme on that.”

::demonstrates effect over the phone::

After he stops laughing, he says (not into the phone), “She says she could play the Star Wars theme on a kazoo.”

Pause.

“Okay, never mind. We’ll just stick with Pachelbel’s Canon in D.”

Thank you very much. I already know that one.